Ender Owen Smith was born on February 11, 2010 at 2:55pm.

Yes, we  got his first name from Enders Game by Orson Scott Card. His middle name was inherited from my Papa, Charles Owen Smith.

All throughout the pregnancy, we have heard birth stories that are all kinds of terrifying. Stories of doctors rushing through births, choosing to induce the mother against her will, pushing for a c-section, and generally running the beautiful process of birth like just another task to accomplish.

Praise God we were blessed with an amazing doctor and an amazing experience.

Our doctor was trained mostly by midwives. She understood and supported our desire to go through this birth as naturally as possible, believing Sarah’s body was made to do this and that Ender wanted to be delivered. Both she and the nursing staff in the maternity ward were supportive, helpful, and a joy to be around.

Contractions started around 7:00pm on the 10th (Wednesday). We had been anticipating Ender’s arrival for about three weeks, believing that he would probably not wait until the due date.  We were wrong.

By 10 pm, her contractions were 4 minuets apart but not painful at all. At the advice of a nurse we decided that it was time to head in to the hospital (with a stop by Taco Bell on the way). At 10:30, Sarah was 100% effaced (which she had been for 2 weeks) and 3cm dilated. They had us wait for 2 hours to check if labor was progressing. Sarah decided to walk some stairs during this time. She is a rock star like that.

By 12:30 am Sarah had progressed enough that the doctor wanted to keep us in there. So, we got settled into a room and contractions started intensifying.

Around 2:00am, Sarah’s water broke. Immediately, she went into “hard labor”. Her contractions intensified and quickened (maybe a minute at most between them), and we started the crazy ride. The amount of discomfort and pain she was in was intense (she said, “it was like I was having my right leg ripped off). Let me tell you, one of the hardest things I have ever gone through in my life is seeing my wife in that much pain. It was all over her face and body. It was absolutely heartbreaking. At the same time, it was so good because we knew our baby was on his way.

By 4:30am, Sarah and I were both drained (her much more than me). I called our good friend Jeannie (who was our doula if needed… and she was needed!) and asked her to come to the hospital. I didn’t know how much more support I could give Sarah by myself.

Jeannie and my aunt Kelly both showed up around 5:30am. We were so glad to see them. Sarah was exhausted. Sarah also deals with severe anxiety which had started to kick in and slow labor way down. She had been was stuck between 5-6cm since 3:00am.

At 6:30, Sarah and I made the decision to give her an epidural. After that was in place, she finally was able to find some relief and rest (somewhat). In fact, we were both able to doze for about an hour or so. Jeannie and Kelly both helped us keep things light. We laughed, joked, talked, and loved on Sarah.

Around 12:00pm, Sarah was ready to start pushing. We quickly fell into the rhythm of, “deep breath… and push, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6…” Sarah is a good pusher. Both the doctor and the nurse said so.

After three hours of pushing, Ender was stuck on a little bit of skin (left over from the hymen). Sarah is such a strong woman, but after everything else, she was losing her strength. So, we talked to the doctor and decided to use a small vacuum to help Sarah’s efforts.

Three or four pushes later, Ender came out. We were expecting him to be around 7 lbs. Instead, Sarah delivered a 8 lp 14 oz kid. I’m telling you, it wasn’t a new born that came out. It was a baby!

Our doctor placed Ender directly onto Sarah’s tummy, and Sarah, Jeannie, and Kelly began to cry. I was in a bit of shock. I mean, wow! this is my baby that my wife just pushed out of her body. My love for her soared, and I gladly kissed Ender, held my wife, and was just amazed (…and took some pictures).

After a few minuets, the doctor got the umbilical cord ready and I cut it. Cutting it felt like cutting a rubber band texture wise. Emotionally, it was a bit surreal. I was helping my baby boy come into his own, moving from in utero to being help, nursed, kissed, and starting his journey toward growing up.

I’m still in a bit of (good) shock from the entire experience.

We came home on Friday evening (2/12) with Ender. Since then, he has been our world. Much love to Evergreen for the care, food, and love they have showered upon us in this past week. Jeannie has been over a few times (not nearly enough… we love that girl!), and we have been slowly adjusting to life with Ender.

He is amazing. A perfect, beautiful boy!

This morning, I received this email from someone who has been following the Georgia prostitution case I commented on last night.

Hey man, I’m a longtime BHT lurker and Georgia resident. This might be relevant to the discussion:

I’m following the bill through the process for a class at Georgia State, and I was there at Lobby Day as the bill was announced. Some good discussion was had regarding the opposition, and some friends of mine actually got to talk to some of them.

The argument they made was that “This is just like when we made birth control legal, and girls started getting pregnant more often, because now it was ‘okay’.” I am not making that up. Literally all of the objections I’ve heard come from either 1. Either not reading the bill, or doing so and lying about what’s in it. Or 2. Disliking the bill because it seeks to help, rather than punish, these boys and girls.

And to the points some others made, it’s important to remember that the lady with the “volunteer”  quote may just be a “watchblogger” but in Georgia, being an awful person who hates children and will use Jesus to get political power doesn’t put you out of the mainstream-it gives you power within it. She may be a wing-nut, but she can still cause a ton of damage. Already the Senator sponsoring the bill is having to work out a compromise with these groups.

That said, it was heartening to see so many middle-aged white folks from various churches coming out in support of the bill-hopefully one day they’ll be seen as the face of Christianity,but right now, Deadwyler and her ilk are hogging that status. (I obviously didn’t mean to exclude others. Just that typically middle aged white christians aren’t who you expect to see supporting such things, and it’s good. In fact, there was amazing diversity present, which was really cool.)

Sigh. People ask me why I’m not Baptist anymore. It’s simple: I converted to Christianity.

Glad you guys are talking about it, and hope this was useful. If you need to, you can read the bill itself here. It’s uncharacteristically short. And I’ll be blogging about it here.

Thanks, and blessings in Jesus,
Doug

You can follow his blog here.

This isn’t just another example of “right wing nut job christians” making an ass out of them selves. This is evil and wickedness in our current time and place and people under the name of Jesus are trying to keep change from occurring!

If we don’t stand up, call evil out, and work toward the restoration of all things that Jesus is gonna complete who will? Who is gonna defend the name of Jesus if not you and I? Or are we content to let people think that Jesus and his people are ok with keeping the victim enslaved and letting wickedness fill the earth?

Dear God, I know it’s been a few years since you did the whole “I will smiteth thee” thing (unless Pat Robertson is right… well, we wont go there…), but do you think you could go all Old Testament on these jackass douche bags?

Thoughts in a Haystack: Georgia On My Mind … and Out of Its. (ht to Harmless Anarchist over at the BHT)

“Hey guys, I got an idea: how about instead of defending and fighting for the little girls caught up in sex trade and slavery in our area we go ahead and make sure they know they a criminals… you know to ’scare them straight’.  Ya, that’ll solve the problems of 12 yr olds wanting to get into whoring. Gotta teach them it’s not a good career path.”

Ya, cause that’s WWJD and all…

I cannot even express how furious this makes me. I want to punch each and every one of these bastards in the throat. It makes me sick to think that people who clam to follow Jesus not only refuse to fight against sexual slavery and the abuse of young children but also want to criminalize them for the abuse they have suffered.

This is evil. This is how I know humanity is broken and wretched to the core.

Oh God that you would break the teeth of the wicked…

Little Miss Perfect: Pageant Parents Go Way Too Far – MamaPop™.com.

Please stop telling your daughter that she is only valuable for her looks, performance, and sexuality. Your just going to make her into another vapid, neurotic mess that is “past her prime” as a junior in college.

Sure, little girls like to dress up, show off, and be the center of attention. That’s part of allot of kids development into self identifying persons. But for an adult to exploit such an innocent norm is perversion at it’s finest. For the parent of the child to exploit it… there is a special place in hell for such evil, and Hitler is glad he didn’t end up there.

What ever happened to protecting our sons and daughters? When did we stop nurturing them and start treating them as show dogs, little pets to do tricks and show off for us. In actuality, you are just showing off your own neurosis and shallow self identity.

Get some therapy, and let your child be a kid.

Melinda Tankard Reist » Blog Archive » Women blindfolded and gagged: the latest in men’s fashion from Roger David.

When I was at the height of my teen awesome/angst (the ’90’s), there was this trend in fashion called ‘heroin chic‘. Advertisers, fashion designers, and wanna be glamor elite everywhere decided that looking like you were coming off a 3 week bender and being skin and bones thin was going to be the new uber attractive. This look (despite being just gross) finally faded from pop culture only after quite a few heroin overdose of celebrity figures.

Who ever thought this was a good idea needs to be slapped around by Skeletor for a few hours. Deciding that it’s desirable to look like a drug ravished, intervention needing, skeleton is still having effects in our culture.

This morning, Nic passed on this article via the twitter. Apparently, one “designer” thinks it’s awesome to put images and slogans invoking (and possibly promoting) rape and sexual assault on his shirts.

Really? You really think this is a good idea?

You know what else would be awesome on a tee shirt? How about some good ol’ boys lynching a negro? Or how about a sniper shooting people as they fill up there gas tank? Or how about John Wane Gacy sitting down to his dinner of a human leg?

Ya, someone would have to be pretty sick to think that any of these ideas were worth promoting in fashion/pop culture, even in an ‘ironic’ sense.

Truth is, evil in the world needs to be called out, called the evil that it is. It needs to be confronted, not laughed into comfort.

Spreading sexual crime images in the name of fashion is as evil as any excuse people make up for rape (it’s her fault, she wanted it, i’m just a guy that got carried away…). It’s all pure bullshit.

And, in the same way heroin chic has influinced a generation and the next, if we don’t get vocal, visual, and loud about this, the idea that sexual assult, rape, and sexual crimes of all sorts are funny is going to influince future generations.

Fuck that noise.

Related:

• An open letter to Roger David @My Bottles Up

“Just as it is difficult-even impossible-for people living in Western society, which has institutionalized change, to appreciate fully the role of mythology, so too it is extremely difficult-perhaps impossible-for people deeply and powerfully shaped by conservative spirituality to accept the forward-looking dynamic of modern culture. It is also supremely difficult for the modernist to understand people who are still nourished by traditional mythical values.”

-Karen Armstrong, Battle for God (pg 35)

I have mixed feelings about the holidays.

On the one hand, I do like the ‘magic’ of Christmas (a favorite memory from childhood is getting up early on cold, Utah winter mornings and enjoying some tea while gazing at the lit Christmas tree), getting together with good friends and family to celebrate, and the general increase in good will toward men that is more prevalent on the tongs of people.

On the other hand, I hate the consumerism that drives this time of year, the expectations to buy, having to show up for once a year ‘holiday parties’ with people you barely know, crappy music blared for a month ans a half, and kitchy decorations.

Most of these things are mixed together, so you can’t just take one side and ignore the other. Take music for example. There are far too many re-makes of songs about santa and his presents. Most new holiday music is even worse than doing yet another remake. But, in the middle of winter play lists, there are some beautiful Christmas hymns that stir the soul. (I must say that it’s weird to hear songs about sin, hope, and salvation from every artist. Makes me wonder if people should sing only what they believe…)

Since I work in the service industry, I am forced to take the good and the bad. Over the years, the bad has made me a humbug. Over all, this time of year I greatly dislike. But, the time of advent, Christmas, and Epiphany I love.

It’s a mixed bag. A religious celebration has been transformed into an annual cultural ritual. As a believer, the religious celebration is something that gives life to my dry faith. As a non-conforming idealist, the cultural ritual makes my stomach turn.

Next year, I am going to be celebrating Christmas with my little one for the first time. I don’t know how to teach him the joy of Christmas while giving him the power to exempt himself from the cultural, money and expectation driven events.

No real point here, just thinking aloud. I want to celebrate Advent and Christmas. I don’t want to participate in the ‘holidays’.