Shame

I’m sure they meant well. I’m sure they didn’t mean to crush my heart and wither my soul. I’m sure they didn’t mean to degrade me and make me feel worthless. I’m sure they didn’t mean to shame me. But they did. Crouched in a paragraph questioning why I was asking for financial assistance for […]

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When Feelings Speak

Every feeling tells a story. These stories that swirl and sway and wriggle and writhe in our chests, these little tellers of truth in our flesh, these feelings are the story tellers that have been hard-wired into our bodies since before we were born of stardust and bone marrow. Feelings don’t just capriciously come and […]

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Untethered and Lost

I’m not the prodigal son. It’s a beautiful story of grace, redemption, and scandal. A son spits in the face of his father, wishes him dead, and cashes out his portion of the inheritance, taking it away to a far country where he proceeds to spend it all on vice, sin, and lasciviousness. When he […]

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Relapse

Maybe I need to go back to IOP. Maybe I don’t need an intensive outpatient program. Maybe I need to check myself into a psych ward for a while. Maybe I need more therapy, more medicine, more treatment for my mental illness. Whatever I need, I need something because I can feel myself slipping. I’ve […]

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I Want to Keep Living

Trigger warning: I talk about the desire to die in this post. I also talk about wanting to live. Proceed with caution if this is a sensitive subject for you. Sometimes I want to die. Sometimes It’s just too much. Sometimes life is overwhelming. Sometimes I feel so fragile in the middle of the storm […]

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